Reclaiming Parenthood by Embracing a “Yes” Mindset

Today, I want to invite you to consider what it would look like to embrace a “yes” mindset with your kids—one that brings joy, connection, and freedom for both you and your children.

Recently, I started to notice how often my default answer to my kids was “no.” My son Jesse innocently pointed this out when he asked me for a snack, and I told him, “No, buddy, it’s time for fruit.” His response? “Mum, why do you always say no?” I laughed, thinking, 'Have you forgotten the snacks I’ve let you have this week?' But it got me thinking. As I paid closer attention, I realized “no” was coming out of my mouth far more than I realized. I was even saying no to things that didn’t need to be a “no”—it was like I was on autopilot.

This sparked a memory of some advice I received when I was pregnant with my first son. An older gentleman told me that his mother rarely said no, but when she did, you knew she meant it. So, I decided to try out a “yes” mindset and to say yes more often—or at least say no less frequently.

Of course, this isn’t about permissive parenting or saying yes to everything. Our kids still need boundaries, guidance, and sometimes the answer has to be a no. But I realized there were countless times I could say yes without compromising safety or responsibility. And sometimes a “yes” can be a “yes, but later.” For example, when Jesse asks to watch TV on a day that isn’t a TV day, I might say, “Yes, buddy, on Monday. What do you want to watch?” Or, if he asks for a snack, I’ll say, “Yes, after a piece of fruit.”

There are times, of course, when we need to say “no.” But even then, I’ve found that creative redirection can ease disappointment and foster cooperation. When Jesse asks for a toy at the store, I might say, “That car looks so cool! But today, we’re here for groceries. Can you help me find the milk?” Or if he wants me to play when I’m busy, I’ll say, “I’d love to play with you soon! Right now, I need to cook. Do you want to build with blocks or sit here with me and chat while I finish up?”

By embracing a “yes” mindset, I’ve seen fewer power struggles, more cooperation, and a new depth of connection. My days feel lighter, and there’s a sense of joy in responding to my children’s requests with openness. I’ve even noticed my own sense of positivity growing, finding myself more willing to embrace moments of spontaneity—jumping on the trampoline, swimming even when I just washed my hair, or just saying “yes” to ice cream on special occasions.

If this feels like a big shift, I encourage you to try it out for a day or even just an afternoon. Our children aren’t asking us for extravagant things; they’re often simply wanting our time and presence. Commit to an afternoon of saying “yes” where you can, or redirecting positively when you can’t. See how it changes the energy of your day and the joy it brings to both you and your children.

Thank you for being here today and for giving yourself space to think about parenthood in a new way. Remember, your children will see the difference in you when you’re connected to God and when He’s guiding your steps. When you thrive, so do they.

Have a beautiful day, friend! Let’s keep saying “yes” to joy, to connection, and to this season of parenthood.